Saturday, October 20, 2012

Random Diaries....



It’s a lazy and lonely Saturday afternoon…Both my roomies are working on Saturday.. So, I have no choice left but to spend morning and afternoon alone.. I am not a loner at all..Guess nobody is by choice…In school, when my bench partner was absent, my entire day was spent so silent…In engg hostel, when my roomies were away, I waited for them to come so that again our room wud be lively wid our noise…At my flat also, I would message my roomie frequently, when r u coming, come soon ....

These days are not nice and me not liking them in a way..They say life comes wid all kinda days..screw that thought..Have you ever felt this way, its like whenever you learn the rules of the game, the game changes..when you are close to the destination, the road map and the road itself changes..A series of such events, douse that flame of hope..But then life isn’t perfect..again screw that thought..But u know wat ders no fun in learning the rules…trust me have learnt and followed hell of them...make ur own rules..

As the life passes you will learn , there’s nothing as good or bad, right or wrong…Its just the perception of  mind. But still we make our own judgements. I hate people making judgements about me..morons they are..dont know ways of life..but then even I was judgemental for some dear ones…And you know wat concept of karma works…Nowadays me and roomie often talks a lot about lives of celebrities and successful people.. we envy about the freewill, they have in life..I know grass is always greener on other side..But then I don’t wanna die as a common person.. I swear my soul will wander if that happens..

But whatever it is, I am not liking these days..wannna go back to those conversations, those laughs, those silly notions, those bucketlist we talked about, those movies , books we discussed, arguments with no conclusions, ways of life we wished, acts of stupidity..Ahh good old days…Again I wanna go back to my engineering days..Fun in classrooms, late night maggi, late night coffee, late night talks, waiting for someone to complete the assignment so that we could copy word to word widout giving any load to mind, watching matches and movies in TV room, we literally survived on Doordarshan, bunking classes just to watch 50 bucks show in E-square, frequent trips for Durga coffee (still remains the best and cheap cold coffee ever), playing some loud music in room and dancing like noone’s watching, rushing for last moment project submission, during exam days me , vrunda and shruti keeping our books aside and gossiping like world is gonna end tomorrow, tripsi on Kinetic wid mayu and anu…

Wanna go back to good old times in tarapur too..While in hostel, visiting tarapur was the biggest upcoming thrill in life..Me n vrunda always counted the days left for going home…People called us homesick fanatics..That day when I was talking  to Sid and prady, we were talking about it’s not that old fun in tarapur now.. times have changed.. They say you should always live in present. Screw that thought again. There’s always a good thing about going back to good old memories..it is a barometer that you did good in life, an indicator that you have gathered loads of good moments in the past…toggling to these memories makes u happy and feel good…Now let me tackle this lonely Saturday afternoon..Let me learn..enjoying the music, reading a book and just cooking for urself alone…And that’s an art..spending the day lonely and still feeling happy about it.. I am wayward poor at this talent..let me try upon this too…

Saturday, October 13, 2012

Woh.....



                                        
                 वों सागर की लहरें , न जाने कितनी रेत समेट जाती है अपने साथ 
वों बारिश की बूँदे , जानती है एहसास बंजर ज़मीन का 
वों छोटी छोटी बातें , न जाने इतनी यादें समेटे हुए है 
 वों किताबों के खोए हुए पन्ने , कई कहानिया अधूरी रखे है 


 वों अधूरी उड़ान, जानती है  मौसम की बेमानी को 
वों रिश्तों की गाँठ , धागे जैसी नहीं तोड़ी जाती 
वों कागज़ की नाव, नहीं जानती तूफ़ान में तैरना 
वों मिटटी की खुशबू , ताज़गी सी भर देती है दिल में 


वों काजल की कालीमा भी नैनों की शोभा बढाए है 
वों रंग-बिरंगी  चुडिया , नहीं जानती बेरंगी दुनिया का एहसास 
वों गुमसुम आवाज़ , न जाने इतने शोर को महसूस करती है 
वों बंद पलके , नहीं होती है हमेशा निद्रा का इशारा 


वो बच्चों के आखोँ की मासूमियत हम सभी में थी , वक़्त न जाने उसे कहा ले गया
वों नंगे पाँव , जानते है कांटो की चूभन को 
वों अधूरे काफ़िले , जानते है अल्फाजों की कीमत 
वों दिये की लौ , जलकर भी रोशन करती है समा


वों रेत जानती है तुम्हें , जहा तुम अपने पैरों के निशान छोड़ आए हों 
वों सरसराती पवन , कभी सुना करती थी हमारी बातें 
वों रेल की पटरिया, गुज़रती है आज भी तुम्हारे घर से होंकर 
और  वों भूल -भूलैया सी ज़िन्दगी , हमेशा पहेलिया करती रहेगी तुमसे ......


woh sagar ki lehere, na jaane kitni ret samet jati hai apne  sath
woh barish ki boonde, jaanti hai ehsaas banjaar zameen ka
woh choti choti baatein ,na jaane itni yaadein samete hue hai
woh kitabo ke khoye hue panne, kayi kahaniya adhuri rakhe hai

woh adhuri udaan, jaanti hai mausam ki bemani ko
woh rishto ki gaantha, dhaage jaisi nahi todi jati
woh kagaaz ki naav, nahi janti toofan mein tairana
woh mitti ki khusboo, tazagi si bhar deti hai dil mein

 woh kajal ki kalima bhi naino ki shobha badhaye hai..
woh rang-birangi  chudiya, nahi janti berangi duniya ka ehsaas
woh gumsum awaaz, na jane itne shor ko mehsoos karti hai
woh band palke, nahi hoti hai hamesha nidra ka ishara

woh baccho ke aakhon ki masumiyat hum sabhi mein thi, waqt na jane usse kaha le gaya
woh nange pav jaante hai kaanto ki chubhan ko
woh adhure kafile jaante hai alfazo ki kimat
woh diye ki lau, jaalkar bhi roshan karti hai sama

 woh ret jaanti hai tumhe, jaha tum apne pairo ke nishaan chod aye ho
woh sarasrati pavan, kabhi sunna karti thi hamari baatein
woh rail ki patariya, guzarti hai aaj bhi  tumahare ghar se hokar.
woh bhul, bhulaiya si zindagi, hamesha paheliya karti rahegi tumse

Saturday, July 14, 2012

Kabhi....



 जिन्दगी  के  मायने  समझने  में  और  इतना  वक़्त  लगाओगे,
 कभी  इन्  छोटे  छोटे  पलो  की  खुशियों  को  निचोड़  कर  तो  देखो...
 और इतना इंतज़ार लेहरे  पीछे हटने  का,  इन् सीपियों के लिए.
 कभी लेहेरो की आहटो में खोना भी सीखों...

और इतना औरों के इशारो पर नाचोगे,
कभी अपनी मस्ती में झूमकर तो देखों..
ये कैसी आधी आधी सी हस्सी है.
कभी खुलकर हस्सी के ठहाके लगाकर तो देखो..
 

आखीर मोती भी सीपियों के ज़ख्मों से ही बनता है..
कभी अपने ज़ख्मो को भी मुस्कुराहाट से देखो..
और इतनी  ख्वाईशो के लिए आँखे मूँद लोगे,
कभी ज़िन्दगी की टहनियों पर लगे ख्वाइशो के फलो को भी चखो..

बातों का क्या है , बस दुनिया करती ही रहेगी.
कभी अपनी दिल की बात सुनकर, दिल की खिडकियों के परदे हटाकर तो देखों.
किश्तों की इस ज़िन्दगी के और इतने बहाने बनाओगे.
कभी मुस्कुराहटें बाटने के बहाने खोजकर तो देखो.

कब तक किनारे से ही नय्या देखते रहोगे.
कभी माज़ी बनकर , खिवैया से लेहरो को चिरकर तो देखों.
मोड आने के इंतज़ार में , सारे सफ़र में ये कैसी बेचैनी ?
कभी सफ़र के हर पल को जी कर  तो देखो ..

कभी नफ़रत में प्यार , कभी सच्चे प्यार में इंतकाम के छीटे...
कभी दुरियो में पास होने का एहसास , कभी क़रीबी में फासलों का आभास...
कभी नम आखोँ में ख़ुशी का इशारा , कभी मुस्कान में छुपा दर्द..
कभी भीड़ में खो जाने का डर , कभी अकेलेपन के साये का डर..
कभी में बटी हुई इस ज़िन्दगी के रंगों में अपनेआप को रंग कर तो देखों ..


Zindagi ke mayane samajhne mein aur itna waqt lagaoge,
Kabhi inn chote chote palo ki khushiyo ko neechod kar to dekho…
Aur itna intezaar lehere piche hatane ka ,inn seepiyo ke liye,
Kabhi lehero ki aahatoin mein khona bhi seekho..


Aur itna auro ke ishare par nachoge
Kabhi apni masti mein jhumkar to dekho
Ye kaisi aadhi aadhi si hassi hai
Kabhi khulkar hassi ke thahake lagakar to dekho..

Aakhir moti bhi seepiyo ke zakhmo se hi banta hai
Kabhi apne zakhmo ko bhi muskurahaat se dekho…
Aur itni khwaisho ke liye aankhe moond loge
Kabhi zindagi ki tehniyo par lage khwaisho ke phalo ko bhi chakho..

Baaton ka kya hai, bas duniya karti hi rahegi
Kabhi apni dil ki baat sunkar, dil ki khidkiyo ke parde hatakar to dekho…
Kishto ki iss zindagi ke aur itne bahane banaoge,
Kabhi Muskurahate battane ke bahane dhunkar to dekho..

Kab tak kinare se hi nayya dekhte rahoge,
Kabhi mazi banaker, khewayya se leharo ko chirkar to dekho..
Modd Ane ke intezaar mein, saare safar mein ye kaisi bechaini,
Kabhi safar ke har pal ko jeekar to dekho..

Kabhi nafarat mein pyar, kabhi sachhe pyar mein intkaam ke sheete,
Kabhi duriyo mein pass hone ka ehsaas, kabhi karibi mein faslo ka abhaas,
Kabhi namm aakhon mein khushi ka ishara, Kabhi muskaan mein chupa dard,
Kabhi bheed mein kho jane ka darr, Kabhi akelepan ke saaye ka darr,
Kabhi mein bati hui iss zindagi ke rango mein apneaap ko kabhi rangkar to dekho...




Wednesday, July 11, 2012

Birthday Wishes/Confessions/Lectures....


Dear Chotu,

You threatened me to write something for you on your birthday....But do you have any idea, that all my life I have been lecturing you on life, its rules and blah blah and you have been hating it from the core of your heart…So sweetie even this post has traces of lectures, confessions and wishes too and you gotta read it, no matter you like it or not :)..

You as a Kiddo
It’s gotta be your 22nd birthday…As a Kid you were always choosy about your birthday’s, but wid time the birthday’s are getting more saner…As a kid, I always hated you for many reasons..Firstly, you were a useless pig when it came to completing your class work and thus lil part of my evening playtime was snatched in completing your class work…When I screamed at you for not completing the class work, with a poor fish face, you replied, the next teacher comes and rubs off the blackboard before I could copy the entire blackboard..But then mom was your super supporter..She always asked me to complete your incomplete class work; for you were a small kiddo for her…Also, the report card analysis was different for you..It was wayward liberal…We were questioned for all the ups and down in our marks, while not much questions were raised when you didn’t perform well.. And oh lord don’t ask about the wrestling’s we had…You kicking me was perfectly fine but myself kicking you was like a wicked act…I remember, once I hit you so hard that my entire palm-print was clearly visible on your arm as a humongous red mark…And before you would approach the supreme-court (mom) with your loud and annoying cry, I silenced you, by tightly shutting your mouth..Don’t try to gather sympathy..Bcuz, even I was victim of your domestic violence..Once you had hit me hard on my head, with some object..For days, I had that pain..Our hatred feeling was mutual:)..And you know what, in the evening games you were always a kaccha limbu (weak player who’s a virtual part of game)..So you were always running around, thinking that you were in the game and you were a good player, but nobody bothered about you :).. And remember, whenever you arrived, there was an awkward silence..Bcuz you leaked all our secrets to mom, we didn’t talk about anything in front of you :).. And I never took you out with my friends.. I always made the excuse to mom, that you act super dumb and rude with my friends..

Shades of Chotu
Time has passed and changed too, and hopefully with the passing time, we have grown up..Back then, no matter how much ever class works I have completed for you, but now, for all my  home work notes of life, I need you, to discuss..No matter, I kept you a weak player in the evening games, but in life’s game you are a real strong player..And no matter I never took you out with my friends, but you are always there to hang out with me, when I am not left with many friends around..No matter, we called you chotu, for we thought you would always remain that irresponsible pig, but the way you take the responsibilities now proves us wrong..And I know; dare anyone say anything to me, you would take that person to task..Also, I must say that you are a very good liar or maybe I am an easy hit to fool around.. But sweetie, always remember lies are of two types..The first type are the one’s widout which no human can survive..And the second type are the ones that break the trust with people around you..Always stay away from this hazardous second type..Mistakes, you really gotta do that, else how you gonna learn..But repeating your mistakes..Don’t do that.. That’s what fools do..Temperament, you gotta control that bcuz after all, a cooler breeze can make the atmosphere pleasant..


You And Me
And don’t worry despite of so many confessions and lectures, I remember it’s your birthday…Many many happy returns of the day sweetie..My best wishes always remain with you..Please, keep asking for pocket money and money to shop..That makes me feel responsible..Don’t you ever stop making fun of me..That makes me feel we are still the same kiddos..Don’t you stop, doing those elongated conversations wid me at night wid louder laughs and giggles…That gives me a high on life feel..And don’t forget to give that helping hand of yours, when someone needs it..That’s the best quality you possess..The way you raise your voice against anything wrong and say it on face to the person..Don’t lose that attitude, trust me very few people have it in today’s manipulative world…Through the turbulent waves and the opposing breeze, across which you sailed and came towards the shore..Not everyone is that good swimmer..And remember, you still remain the best rider for me..So rush through the maps, find your own roads and go chase your destination..And while doing all these, if they still hand over you hurt, hatred, disgust and failure..Don’t worry; I will be standing there, just besides you…

Love Maii..

Saturday, May 19, 2012

Childhood Summers with the Sunshine gal....



Summers, sometimes they are annoying.. Annoying bcuz the scorching heat bakes the body like earthen pots and the sweat flows through the body like tributaries of the river.. Annoying bcuz you don’t feel like going out during weekends and annoying bcuz it doesn't allow you to go out for a vacation.. All travel plan sites indicate, all the destinations not to be visited preferably during April-May and hill-stations are all the more crowded, which would never give you the solace..But as Emily Dickenson Says, “ ..To see the Summer Sky is Poetry..”

Summer Sky - Monali's Photography
 So this summer I would take the sunshine gal Kyra to the journey of my childhood summer vacation, to the stories that I have lived, to the other side of summer vacation, to a place where fun and frolic rolled .. To a place unheard, place unseen, to a place where there are no exotic beaches but still the serene water and tranquil sky gives the peace of life, place where there are no expensive spas but the solacing effect of breeze, calms your mind. .Place that is away from the crowd, away from the commotions, away from those complexities, that have twitched life...Place where, there’s music humming with the waves and fun rolls with the sand.. 
Summers of my childhood is some 15 years ago, when summer use to come along with School summer vacations..All my summer vacations were spent at my Nani’s place..It's a place called Shirgaon, 100 Kms from Mumbai and at a drive of 45 minutes from my home in Tarapur..We kids, submitted the last paper of Annual exams and waited for my dad to come from office, so that he could drop us to my Nani’s place...My Nani, she's the most beautiful lady with the most lovely eyes, I have ever come across..Today also when I meet her, she gives the same smile and the same hug, I used to get as a kid...My Nani’s place, it’s a place, surrounded by orchards of coconut and supari (coming to the details later on), house from where beach is at a walk of 10 minutes, and there’s a pond at a walk of some 15 minutes..It's a lonely house, with no neighborhood..When there’s no neighborhood, you can shout, scream and laugh aloud, that’s the best part..Apart from coconut and supari orchards, the house was also surrounded by Mango, Jamun, Jackfruit and Cashew nut trees all being the fruits of summer season and so I can somehow manage to remember them...
Nani's House - Monali's Photography
Shoreline near the place - Monali's Photography
Our mornings started with the amazing tea and rice rotis made by Nani. Also, sometimes we had omelets and rice rotis for breakfast..For omelets, each kid had their own variety be it half-fry, beaten omelets or onion omelets and Nani made it according to each one's preference..After our breakfast, we plunged into the water tank..Yes, there was a water-tank in the premises, which was meant for the irrigation purpose in the fields, but we kids assumed it as our mini-swimming pool. Today when we look at it, we wonder, how come so many kids were accommodated in it....Everyday my Nanaji used to switch on the water-pump sharp at 8 O' clock in the morning and the water pump was off by 12 O' clock in the afternoon..We played a game of splashing water outside, and whoever jumped into the tank by splashing maximum water was the winner...

Pond near the place - Monali's Photography
Nanaji and Nani - old pic
 My Nanaji, he was a really strict and short tempered person…He used to yell at us for splashing the water out of water tank, for it disturbs the irrigation process. But we made those fish faces in front of him, and when he left we laughed like shameless pigs and again do what we wanted to do..Sometimes, he switched off the water pump, so that we get out of the water tank.. But then we kids had our Nani as our superhero, so we complained her and she declared it aloud; let the kids do whatever they want and that nobody would intervene in their summer vacations. And so happy faces we were again: D..But no matter, how much ever strict my Nanaji acted with us, he always kept basket full of ripened Mangoes and Jamuns for us and sliced the ripened Jackfruit (cutting Jackfruit stands the most tedious task) 
 
After our lunch, afternoons were pretty boring bcuz we were asked, not to roam around during afternoons and take a siesta. So while everyone took a nap, we kids sat across the fence-side, waiting for the ice candy man.. And thus; waiting for the candy man was like a daily siesta routine for us, and by the time summer vacation ended, candy man was our friend and we played some cheap bargain tricks with him to get free candies.. It was a place by beach side, but we kids were never allowed to go alone on beach..Nani was a master in narrating those threatening fake stories. She threatened us that those kids’ snatchers roam on the beach, and that they would put the kids in the gunny bags and take them along..So we always waited for our uncle to come over, so that we could go to the beach...                         
                                                                                                                                     
Legendary Wada-Pav - Monali's Photography

Going to the beach without wada-pav and coke was like a sin, even when we were kids and now, even when we are grown ups..Beaches, sometimes they teach us so many things...Those waves..They come back with a high tide again.. That breeze. It knows story of you and me..It touches everyone's soul without marking any difference..That sand on which, we left our footprints..Those sea-shells, for whom we waited for the waves to go back..The horizons, that paints our lives. Shoreline, it has a beautiful relationship with the ocean and as Sarah Kay says “….There’s nothing more beautiful than the way ocean refuses to stop kissing the shoreline no matter how many times it’s sent away..”

Ecstasy at beach - Monali's Photography
Beaches were always fun, making those tiny sand hills, carving your name upon the sand, running around the Suru trees, going behind the fisherman and asking them to show the catch for their day, jumping across the high tides and getting all wet...Besides the beach, there was a beautiful sand hill, it was carved out by the construction people for the sand required for construction purpose...
Sunset - Monali's Photography
We climbed the sand hill from one end, and had a freefall from the other carved end. There's nothing more exciting than falling down from the sand hill, rolling all over the sand, with the sand going into your boots, your hairs, your fingernails and your pockets.. By the time we reached home from the beach, it would be dinner time. And fish fry and fish curry made by Nani, still remains the best one's I ever had.

Suru trees near the beach side - Monali's Photography
 And yes about the coconut and supari orchards. Every summer, a coconut vendor visited Nani’’s place along with a truck, to upload the coconuts and along with a crew of the 8-9 people to pluck the coconuts..Chacha, that's what we called this coconut vendor, he was kid’s favorite..He was a tamilian and he had this amazing skill of making stuff with coconut leaves..Like origami makes those beautiful swans and roses with paper, he made a cricket ball and a bird out of coconut leaves..Whenever it was coconut plucking time, we kids were told not to roam around in the orchards, and that we would be hit by the falling coconuts..But who cared and we roamed around..

Coconut Orchards - Monali's Photography

Supari's - Monali's Photography
For supari, things were quite different. Supari is an orange fruit initially; it needs to be dried and peeled, to get the nut inside. This nut is used in paans, gutkas and all that stuff which spoils your mouth. Once dried, they are sealed in gunny bags and are bought by the vendors.. And I thank god that there was this entire process of supari drying; else we kids would never had the fun of playing cricket in suparis..Yes, playing in suparis. Usually suparis were spread over the terrace for drying in the sun, so we played cricket on the surface of suparis...The rules were pretty clear, the ball shouldn't go beyond the terrace boundary, and if does so, the one who hit it, ought to get it..There’s nothing more fun than hitting a ball and running over the suparis, at other end of the so called supari pitch, to get runs..

Supari Trees - Monali's Photography

Background is the dried Supari field for cricket :D - old pic

 And yes about the dragonfly story...Back then, there was a huge rose garden besides the coconut orchards..Now it's a bare land..No more pink roses with huge petals and yellowish pistils, no more butterflies and no more dragonflies..Yup dragonflies, during evening time the rose garden was flooded with the butterflies of all colors and dragonflies with a golden tail and sharp transparent wings..We kids were little evil and coward too..Coward bcuz we attacked butterflies and dragonfly from the back, while they landed upon the roses..And evil bcuz we catched those dragonflies and tied its tail with a thread and when the dragonfly made an attempt to fly, we pulled the thread..When my mom witnessed these evil activities, she called us and told us that imagine somebody snatching your freedom by tieing strings to your feet, and also god would really punish us for doing this heinous act..And so we released the dragonfly and that’s why, today when something bad happens to me, I feel it's the curse of the dragonfly, may be it was hurt that time and may be the concept of karma really works...

It's not just this but there are lot more stories other than this, stories of weaving mats from coconut leaves, stories of visiting bazaars with Nani, story of the huge shoe-flower plant, which we kids assumed as airplane, story of making clay toys, story of that Doberman doggie, who literally chased me till the air knocked out of my lungs and built the fear of dogs inside me and many more.. 

So the then good summers use to pass by, through the beaches, backwaters, roaming around in sun without the fear of getting tan, rolling over the sand hill without worrying about sand dispersing everywhere, riding over the high tides without the fear of getting drowned, biting tamarind and raw mangoes and making those sour expression faces, jumping on the heap of hay without the fear of getting any hay-particle allergy, taking a high ride on the swing with the feel of rising above the sky..Where's that insanity slipped down suddenly, where's that fearlessness and temerity disappeared, where those imaginations evaporated, where’s that carefree feel vanished suddenly…And that's why growing up is no fun…And that's why keeping that little kid alive in us is no wrong. I did really thank my grandparents for those priceless summer vacations, and so I indeed owe them a super vacation..Sometimes, we really ought to do a reverse engineering of life, just to figure out how many apologies are still pending, how many thanks are still to say, how many return gifts still we ought to give and how many vacations still we owe….


P.S: This post has been written for Indiblogger's ‘Lakme Diva Blogger Contest' - Tell us how will you live it up this summer with Kyra, have fun and enjoy sunshine like never before
Please click on the image below for details  



If you like my post, you can vote for it here: Click on the image below